Hallo! We meet again! It's been a while, huh? Well I had a wildly busy spring and summer, but don't worry-- I never forgot you! What was I doing all that time you ask? Helping my best friend plan a wedding, working at the farmer's market, making art, crafting and cuddling, moving to a new apartment... Yeah, I'd call that a busy year.

But things are winding down now, and as summer fades into fall it has me in a decidedly domestic mood. As soon as it starts to get chilly out, my mind is on crocheting, baking, apple picking, and cuddly movie nights. I've had a recipe idea kicking around in the back of my mind for a few weeks now, and it is easy, decadent, and completely delicious. Apple Cinnamon Goo's*! It's apple-y, it's cinnamon-y, it's gooey, and chewy, and sweet! Prepared cinnamon roll dough and apple pie filling combine to make a sweet turnover, and during baking the steam separates the cinnamon roll layers, giving them the appearance of a beautiful seashell. Let's start baking!

*Cinnamon Goo's are the name my wonderful boyfriend bestowed on cinnamon rolls, his favorite food, as a toddler. The name was so funny it stuck, and soon his whole family picked it up. Now it feels so natural for us to refer to cinnamon rolls as goo's, we forget they were ever called anything else!

Apple Cinnamon Goo's
Makes: 5 servings
Prep time: 1 hour, 30 minutes (about 30 active)

What You Need:
- One package prepared cinnamon roll dough (large size, the kind that come 5 rolls in a tube)
- 2-3 Granny Smith apples, diced
- lemon juice, 1 lemon yields
- 2 Tbsp sugar (light brown or raw sugar will give you richer caramel flavor)
- 1 Tbsp cinnamon
- 1/4 Tsp nutmeg
- 1/4 Tsp corn starch
- pinch of salt
- AP flour (to dust your rolling pin and work surface)

What to Do:
Preheat your oven to 350F. Open your cinnamon roll dough and separate the rolls. Let these sit out at room temperature for 30 minutes. They will begin to soften and expand, which will make them easier to work with.

 In a medium sized bowl, mix together apples, lemon juice, sugar, cinnamon, nutmeg, cornstarch, and salt. Make sure the apples are evenly coated, then cover with plastic wrap. Let this sit for at least 30 minutes so the flavors can combine and the sugar and salt can pull a little juice out of the apples.

Now that your cinnamon roll dough has warmed up a little, it's time to roll them out. Thoroughly flour your work surface and rolling pin. Do not skip this step!! If you don't use enough flour, you will simply end up with a sticky, buttery, cinnamon mess. Flour is cheap, don't be stingy! Start by flouring the top and bottom of the dough round, and gently begin to flatten it with the palm of your hand. Using your rolling pin, gently roll the dough into a flat round by rolling the pin away from you. After each pass of the rolling pin, flip the dough over and turn 1/4 clockwise. This will help you to make a smother, rounder shape. Once the dough is about 1/4-3/8 of an inch thick, set aside. Make 5 rounds this way.

Line a baking sheet with foil and have it standing by for the finished goo's. Spoon 1-1 1/2 Tbsp of apple filling into the center of the dough round, and gently fold the dough in half, enveloping the filling completely. The layers will want to separate at the cinnamon seams, but allowing the dough to warm up helps them to be a little more flexible. Keeping the bottom solid is more important, so if one side splits just place it on your baking tray split-side-up, and cup the top together. During baking the steam will separate the top seams anyway, but by keeping these as tight as possible before baking will give them a nicer shape when they open up in the oven. Do not overfill the dough or it will open up flat and look more like a messed up dessert pizza than a beautiful shell. Save any extra filling for later.

Place your filled goo's on the baking sheet with at least an inch between each or they will not be crunchy on the outside. Bake on the middle rack for 15-18 minutes, or until they reach a golden brown color on all sides. Let the goo's cool to room temperature, then drizzle the cinnamon roll icing over the top.

Hey, remember that leftover filling? Here's a sweet secret: place leftover filling in a microwave safe bowl, cover with plastic wrap and microwave on high for 3 minutes. Leave the filling covered with the wrap and in the microwave until you're ready to serve your goo's and-- well would you look at that? Warm apple chutney. No extra work. Everybody wins!

As you can see in the picture, I served these not just with the apple chutney, but with some vanilla bean gelato, as well. And I'm not ashamed, it was delicious! Know what was even better? Warming up leftover goo's (15 sec in the microwave on high) for breakfast the next day. Scandalous!

After 10 long laptop-less weeks, I am relaxed and reinvigorated. A little time AFK has given me time to read and think and I am super stoked to share my new passion for "me-time" activities like hand quilting and hula hooping!

This past New Year's Eve, my bestie got engaged and I could not be more excited for her! Even better, she asked me to be her maid of honor. She wasted no time in setting a date, and before you know it the big day is now six months away. I've been doing my best to help out with planning (even if 'helping' means letting her vent over cocktails) and things are going well, but there is one undeniable fact looming on the horizon. In six months, whether I am ready or not, I will be responsible for making myself as presentable as possible for more photos than I would care to think about. This sudden need to try on formalwear has gotten both of us on a serious health kick.

For me breakfast is the hardest meal of the day. My ideal breakfast? A triple venti caramel macchiato with whole milk, and maybe a toasted buttered croissant or two if I'm feeling peckish. This is not a skinny girl breakfast by any means. So to make mornings a little easier on my hips I've turned to oatmeal. No! Wait! Don't turn away just yet!! I know, oatmeal is a huge Internet foodie fad. And if you're an oatmeal amateur like I was, chances are good that the only oatmeal you've had comes out of an envelope and gets no more love than a quick zap in the microwave. But oatmeal lovers have been right all along! Oatmeal is a food that demands your attention, and the more love you give, the more your efforts will be rewarded. In my experience, the longer it takes to prepare your oatmeal, the better it is. Stay away from quick-cook or instant versions. Those tend to have that slimy, gluey consistency and taste like cardboard and paste. I like old fashioned steel cut oats, sometimes called Irish oatmeal. It keeps a nice al dente texture, and tastes warm and nutty, providing a base for flavor that makes me think more of a rich breakfast risotto than health food.

In honor of my new love of oatmeal, here are two easy recipes that take less than ten minutes to prep and cook, and will convert you to an oatmeal devotee like me!

Banana Bread Oatmeal
You will need:
1 banana 6"-7"
1/4 c. Steel cut oats
3/4 c. Water
1/8 c. Chopped, toasted walnuts
2 tsp Sugar in the Raw
1 tsp cinnamon
1 tsp pure vanilla extract
Salt and nutmeg to taste

Boil the water in a small pot. Stir in oats and salt, turn temperature to low. Slice 3/4 of the banana into the pot and stir slowly. Add the sugar, cinnamon, and nutmeg. Stir slowly until the mixture reaches the consistency of a creamy soup or chowder. Cooking oatmeal is a lot like cooking eggs, if you cook it til it's done, you'll eat it overcooked. Turn off heat and stir in walnuts and vanilla. By saving the vanilla til the end you keep the freshest vanilla flavor possible. Pour the mix into a bowl as it continues to thicken. Top with thin slices of the last 1/4 of banana and sprinkle with cinnamon.

Now, I know I said not to over cook the oatmeal, but that's not necessarily true. I really like this recipe when it's overcooked and allowed to sit for a while. I eat it while it's still warm, but letting it sit gives it a denser texture, almost like an English boiled pudding.

Speaking of pudding, here's another one that has a distinctly desert-like appeal.

Blackberry Vanilla Oatmeal
1 c. Blackberries
1/4 c. Steel cut oats
3/4 c. Water
2 tsp honey
1 tsp pure vanilla extract
2 tbsp plain Greek yogurt

Bring water to a boil in a small pot. Add salt, oats, honey, and blackberries. Reserve 8-10 blackberries to use later. Turn heat to low and stir. Once the berries begin to turn red, start to mash the mixture as you stir. Cook over low heat for 5-7 minutes, then turn off the burner and add vanilla. Pour into a bowl and top with remaining blackberries and a big creamy blob of Greek yogurt.

Just think of oatmeal as a delicious canvas. Add fruit, cook it in tea or juice, add crunchy things, sweet things, chewy things, creamy things, chocolate, nuts, jams and marmalades, butter, flavor extracts and syrups. Really, as long as you start out with good oatmeal, use your intuition and make something tasty!!

Giving Handmade

When it comes to gift giving I'm more a Jack Donaghy then a Liz Lemon. I spend hours distilling what I know about the recipient, divining the perfect gift to say how well I know them. A good gift is a reflection of the qualities you love in a person. Normally the thought of a gift card makes me feel lazy, but sometimes it's the perfect thing. This year one of my coworkers is a serious coffee addict, and I knew right away that a gift card for his favorite coffee shop was practically the only option. To make it personal, I made a cute gift card holder from materials you can find around the house. The best part? It's so easy to make, even Tracy Jordan could do it! So whatever you celebrate this time of year, make one of these gift card holders and give a gift your friends can cherish long after the balance on the card runs out!

You will need:

- old magazines, preferably something that reflects the interest of the recipient
- clear packing tape
- scissors
- a pen
- a ruler or measuring device (as you can see, I used a strip of cardboard!)


To make your gift card holder:

Step 1. Select the images you want to see on the front of your gift card holder. I chose this blue skeleton illustration by Andy Howell. For the back, a more abstract blue piece, and finally the black and white print for the inside. The interior is completely optional, but you'll need at least two pieces for the front and back. Look for themes and objects that remind you of the person you're making it for, or interesting textures, colors, and patterns.

Step 2. Once you have selected your magazine pages, it's time to measure your gift card.

You can use a ruler, but for me a straight strip of cardboard works just fine. Mark the width (W) and length (L) on your cardboard, or write your measurements on a separate piece of paper. Add 1/4 inch in either direction to allow enough room for your gift card to slide in and out easily. Use this measurement to cut out the rectangle for the back of your gift card sleeve. This rectangle will now be the template for your other four pieces.

 

Step 3. Gently lay strips of packing tape over the top of the cut out, being careful to avoid air bubbles or creases. Leave some tape overlapping the edges, then flip it over and repeat, sticking the tape to itself along the sides.

Repeat with each piece, and trim around edges leaving a small margin of tape, about 1/16th of an inch. Now you should have four (or two) laminated rectangles. Place the back of an outside piece against the back of an inside piece and repeat the process to create a rectangle with your design sealed in on both sides. 

Step 4. After carefully trimming these pieces, line them up for the last round of tape. Lay them on top of each other with the right sides out and begin the taping process one more time, but leave one edge free with no tape overlapping. This will become the opening for your gift card sleeve.

Seal the edges and trim one last time. As you trim each progressive layer, leave an additional 1/16th of an inch to make sure the tape has enough surface area to adhere to itself. If you accidentally trim through the tape, the layers will split apart. Just add another layer of tape until the sleeve is sealed on three sides and smooth around the edges. 

Step 5. Check your sleeve for holes, then insert your gift card! Spend your remaining craft time sitting in front of a mirror, practicing looking humble when your friend explodes with excitement at your gift presentation expertise.

Ta da! Now you have a sweet personalized way to give a gift card! And the best part? This sleeve can be reused as a credit card holder or wallet, making it a DOUBLE GIFT! Gee, aren't you thoughtful!!

Yes, Virginia, There Is A Santa Claus-- But Paypal Froze His Assets

I love Regretsy. There, I said it. In the crafting world it will make you friends and enemies faster than you can holster your glue gun. Sometimes mean, derisive, or just plain gross, Regretsy is the rebellious teenage brother to Etsy's nine-year-old-girl complex. While I adore the two websites equally, Etsy's official policy on most things comes in the form of 'la la la I can't hear you la la la', Regretsy drunkenly shouts admonishments from the rooftops. And for that I love them.

If you can't get behind Regretsy for Hellen Killer (April Winchell, the hilarious writer and voice of every cartoon character you've ever loved) and her army of fat, jealous losers (their term, not mine!) for their sense of humor, you have to appreciate them for their generosity. They cram charity into as many aspects of the site as possible. You can join April's Army to sell your crafts for various causes. They take requests from members in need for assistance, they encourage the dark recesses of the internet to sponsor kids on charity walks, they bring good people together and focus all that crazy into a vortex of snarky comments and genuine kindness.

This year the big-hearted jerks over there decided to throw a Secret Santa fundraiser, taking requests from members for kids in need and encouraging everyone who reads the blog to donate $2. Several thousands of donations later, the kids were getting the presents, the Regretsians were getting drunk, and everyone was happy as a lark. Then Paypal got wind of all the goodwill and joy that this fund was causing, and wanted to get in on the action. So they took the money. All of it. This is the point where everyone starts finding parallels between Paypal and the Grinch, so I'm not going to do that. You already did, I'm sure, because the situation would be downright funny if it weren't just so sad.

April tells the story far better than I do, so for further details I direct you to the Regretsy post detailing the whole affair.

As soon as this post went up, the internet exploded with outrage. Literally. I had to get a new monitor and everything. Paypal was berated all night long with outraged customers demanding this issue be resolved and shutting down accounts left and right. There are a lot of sneaky, sneaky things Paypal can get away with, but stealing toy money from poor children at Christmas? This one was just out of their league. Paypal wisely backed down with a quick and insincere apology, but a good point was brought up by one of the hundreds of commenters voicing their outrage: What about the little guy? This is a point that affects me directly. And scares me. What recourse would I have if MY account were frozen for attempting to better myself and others with charity? I don't have an army of cheeto-dust covered internet lawyers to screech my case all over Facebook*. Would Paypal be as receptive to my pleas, or would I end up on the wrong end of a short phone call with a terrible service rep?

So I add my tiny, fat, jealous, loser-ish voice to the chorus with this letter to Paypal:


To Whom It May Concern:


In light of the recent troubles with Regretsy and it's associated charity issues, I'm sure you have your hands full right now. Phones are probably ringing, henchmen getting canned, the CSRs are all being flogged in the dungeons for their mistakes. But you label this apology a 'Resolution', a term your company throws around quite loosely, and I would like to know exactly what is being resolved. Are you simply refunding the money, or will there be a significant policy change, as well as a dramatic overhaul of the Customer Service procedures? Will you be refunding the processing fees on top of your donation, or is that included?

I appreciate the prompt response to this issue, but it has the appearance of a hasty fix to save face, and lacks the feel of genuine remorse. I applaud you for admitting you were wrong, but do you still intend to make a profit off YOUR mistake? Any processing fees should be refunded (excluding those of the initial donation), because we know you're not the soulless monsters you appear to be, right?
In light of the current nation-wide corporate backlash, it's even more difficult to believe this is anything other than a clever play by marketing to show that, unlike other big companies, Paypal has a 'human' side. Will these policies be re-written, or made more available and clearly expressed to avoid future confusion? I often organize small charity drives among friends, nothing large and certainly nothing I can register as a non-profit, and had not used but considered Paypal donations as an option. Now I worry that this same situation could happen to me, and without a chorus of a thousand voices calling for resolution I can't imagine Paypal would be this responsive or remorseful. 

I fully understand that your privacy policy prevents you from going into details about this specific case. I respect that, and I'm glad you do, too. But let's talk about the public side of it, the major flaws in policy that have been brought to light. You're at a crossroads right now, and this seems like an easy decision: cut your losses, admit that your policies need to change, and make serious commitments to fairness and open business practices with more transparency of process. The other road, well, it's not as pretty. The climate of American business is shifting, and no matter which side you're on, it would be foolish to ignore the change completely. Raise this company to be an example of the new integrity-based American business model, or become a footnote on the Wikipedia page for this period in time.
Choose wisely, please. Because I like you. I really, really do. I like how convenient you are, I like that you're there when I need you. But I don't feel like I can trust you, and I think many of your customers feel the same way. Seize this moment as an opportunity to become the perfect example of the Good Big Business, before someone else does.

Thank you for your time,
Jennifer

This letter has also been posted to the Paypal Facebook page, the Paypal blog, and sent to Paypal in email form. Feel free to pass it along to Paypal yourself, or tell them how you feel about their current business model. This is an opportunity for a good change, and I hope they take it.

*To see some of the outrage for yourself, visit the Paypal Facebook page and click 'Everyone (Top Posts) to watch in real time. As of the time of this post, the rage fest was still in full effect. Remember, you DON'T have to 'like' the page to comment!

6 Home Remedies to Murder the Common Cold

Winter is approaching, the air is cool and crisp. People are bundling up and gathering around warm fires, sharing stories and goodwill. A lovely time for humanity to step back, take stock of the little things we have and be grateful. And what else do we share at this time of year the very most of all? Our horrible, nasty, evil diseases. From the Christmas cookies in the conference room to the handmade Hanukkah card from Aunt Sue, everything you touch today is absolutely encrusted with germs.

"But wait!" you think, "I'm too busy already, and I DO NOT have the time to get sick right now!"

Well your troubles are over because I, like any top-notch writer, have done the research for you. I have achieved the perfect winter cold (all in the name of science, of course) and am prepared to test every remedy any bored housewife can dream up. Why? To discover the true cure for the common cold! Science, my friend, SCIENCE!

Let's begin, shall we?


Remedy 1: Garlic, Ginger, Cinnamon, and Tumeric

If there's one thing that gets those rhinovirus bastards shaking in their boots, it's Indian food. Why? Well garlic, ginger, cinnamon, and tumeric are all recommended for easing the symptoms of a cold. Now don't get carried away, these ingredients aren't magic. Sure, some folks will try to tell you that tumeric has anti-inflammatory properties, or that garlic is a decent antiseptic. These people are swindlers and snake oil salesmen. The truth behind these fallacies is that colds absolutely hate deliciousness. Those little moments of joy we get from a single bite of tasty curry are like a thousand deaths to the germ armies invading your upper respiratory system. So give'em hell! Eat a curry, cure your cold!

Remedy 2: Lemon Juice, Honey, and Hot Water

The last I heard, this concoction was the reason Beyonce's fat ass isn't quite so fat anymore. I was pretty sure this mix had something to do with a Hollywood fad diet, the kind where you consume nothing but hot liquids and shame. Which leads us to the conclusion that the germs responsible for your cold are probably working with Hollywood to advance the anti-fat agenda. The Hollywood types will tell you that's ridiculous, and that the massive concentrations of Vitamin C are to blame for your increased desire to live another day. They'll even try to tell you that honey is a natural antibacterial agent and can soothe your throat after hours of trying to cough out your own lungs. But you know Hollywood can spin a story twenty two ways to Sunday, don't believe the hype! Colds hate fat. So eat another curry.

Remedy 3: Homemade Chicken Soup, Made By Mom

Well from our first experiment we already proved quite conclusively that colds hate tasty treats. Combine that with the power of a loving mother hovering over you day and night with tissues and vapor rubs and concerned looks at that tattoo she never noticed before, and those germs won't even know what hit them. When that liquid chicken goodness storms down your throat like Allied troops at Normandy, you can be sure those little germ Nazis are being exterminated once and for all. If your mother hasn't done so already, you may want to throw a little curry in your soup for extra effectiveness. Remember that having a cold is like waging war, and General Mom can't win alone! Think of her soup as your advancing troops, and the curry your best sniper. Play with a full deck and guarantee success.

Remedy 4: Over-The-Counter Cold 'Medicine'


Most OTC remedies rely on two things: your desperation to try absolutely anything to end this damn cold, and your ignorance of the restorative properties of a fine curry.  Many stores will have whole aisles stocked with treatments developed by doctors, teachers, scientist, probably a few that your crazy neighbor stuffed on the shelf while no one was looking. I have never trusted doctors, with their fancy white coats and sly code words. No, the only doctor for me is Pepper, because he doesn't make a buck off me when I get sick. Just imagine, if you were actually cured of your cold, those doctors would have to take a break and might realize they wasted the best drinking years of their lives studying. This kind of realization can lead to major breakdowns, and that's not the kind of person you want to trust will your well-being, is it? Most of the 'medicine' offered tends to leave you with side effects worse than the cold started out with, and you'll be lucky if you can perform simple tasks like driving yourself to the liquor store, or preparing another one of those delicious curries. Don't take the risk.



Remedy 5: Lay Low. Literally.

No one will suggest that having a cold is easy. The pressure in your sinuses make your head feel like a baked potato in a butter commercial. If only it could split open to release that steam and sweet, fluffy potato meats, you'd feel fine. But my legal team has banned me from recommending a butter knife to the face, so we're left having to discover our own ways to relieve the constant throbbing in our faces. Low altitudes can help decrease sinus pressure, so instead of flying to your weekend retreat in the Swiss Alps, consider a relaxing drive to somewhere sea level. Maybe you're still too whacked out on cold 'medicine' from Remedy 4 to drive, or too bloated from all that curry. I understand. In this case the best thing to do is to acquire a skateboard, sled, or perhaps a small wagon, lay down, and let yourself roll to the lowest point in town. This ensures the lowest face pressure around, and you're guaranteed to make some interesting new friends on the way! Be sure to share your new medical knowledge with them, as you have likely passed the plague on to most of the village at this point.

Remedy 6: Whiskey, Whiskey, Whiskey

While experts on natural cures often disagree on precisely what herbs cure colds, or how they do it, there is one single point on which they all agree: drink lots and lots of fluids. And is there any fluid better than whiskey? No. No there isn't. Bourbon and gin are acceptable substitutes, but real, true Irish whiskey will have you back on your feet, ready to attack the day, possibly with a knife. The proof of this remedy can be seen all around you! Have you ever met an Irish person with a cold? Me neither. That accent would sound ridiculous with even mild congestion.

I've been washing this curry down with whiskey for the majority of this article, and I gotta say I feel great. Proof positive that this one works. So it stands to reason that the more whiskey you drink, the deader your cold shall be. I think I'll stitch that on a sampler later.

***
This post was originally written as a submission for another website, but I just liked it too much to send it away.
For actual medical advice from real trained professionals, try these tips:

http://www.mayoclinic.com/health/cold-remedies/ID00036

Ahhhh, the weekend. A time to relax, to renew. A time for quiet contemplation, a time to recharge for the week ahead. I, of course, did none of those things. I dove into this weekend headfirst, because this past weekend was Supermegafest in Framingham, MA. This small-but-proud gathering of all things fandom drew us in like a mosquito to a bug zapper, and at 6 o'clock Saturday morning we leapt out of bed, watched our favorite episode of Star Trek*, and headed off to the convention center.

Comic book conventions run in my blood. I started attending with my father just as soon as I could walk, back in the days when most were nothing more than a few middle-aged guys renting a conference room to trade books and argue whether the Kessel run can truly be measured in parsecs.** But in the last 20 years the Convention has grown into a behemoth encapsulating every piece of pop culture a person could possibly imagine. In keeping with tradition, Ryan and I went with my father and helped a friend of his to run a comic book booth. This meant one important thing to us: dealer passes. We got to rummage around the sales booths over an hour before the rooms officially opened to pillage the loot to our hearts desire. We met Tia Carrere and Sala Baker, sufficiently embarrassed ourselves to each one, and collected their autographs. Our favorite movies are Wayne's World and Lord of The Rings, respectively, so by the time the doors opened we had already achieved 60% of our goals for the day. Almost.

Once the doors had opened, the real insanity commenced. My favorite part of a convention is always the attendees. The costumes, the social awkwardness, the unrecognizable aromas, the furious devotion. Some costumes were amazing, some were terrible, some were completely unidentifiable, and some were just sad. But none have ever stolen my heart like Mr.T. Not the real Mr.T., mind you. Convention Mr.T. He attends public events dressed as Mr.T., takes photos with people, shakes hands, gives hugs, and does it all in character all day long. Just for the hell of it. I had to get a picture with him, if only to take a small piece of that enthusiasm home.

 I intend to hire him as my life coach.

The main event for us was still to come. The Q&A panel with Sir Patrick Stewart! We met up with our friend Shane, grabbed our tickets, and started queuing over an hour before the doors opened. When they finally let us in I was shocked by how small the room was. I have failed college classes larger than the attendance allowed. It was amazing. 

You have every right to be that smug, You're Captain Picard AND Prof. X. Work it. 

He came out and casually talked about the weather, fruit, and how his homemade jams are coming along this season. A few times he looked me right in the eye! Or maybe the cleavage. I wasn't leaning out into that aisle for nothing. He took a few questions, gave some amazing  'typical Patrick Stewart' type answers, and showed off his incredibly buff 71 year old arms. He hasn't aged since 1966.

After 13 hours of fans, sweat, toys, comic books, too much coffee and junk food, celebrities, and  a thousand blurry pictures of Patrick Stewart, we were exhausted. Most cons end with a party in the hotel bar, and this one had a free concert, too. We were a little too wiped out to go party, but we got some first class people-watching in from the couch near the bar. And I'll always have Mr.T. 

 Oh, and this happened. You figure it out. 

See ya next year, nerds!

*It's TNG Ep. 101 "Darkmok"  

**It can't. Anyone who says it can is a George Lucas sympathizer or scientifically illiterate.

It's On The Tip of My Tongue...

We all know you're brilliant. You're reading this blog, which is incontrovertible proof. But some days your brain just refuses to cooperate. A friend or coworker asks you a simple question and you prepare a stunningly witty response, but somewhere between your genius muscle and your talky parts... well you just can't find the right word. It's right on the tip of your tongue... whatever it is. We've all been there.

There are several traditional remedies for the serious ailment known as brain farts. You could spend hours on end reading the dictionary cover to cover. Tattoo a list of words on your arm Momento-style. Or install a picture window directly in your forehead to let people see your thoughts without your clumsy lips getting in the way. But if you ask me, the easiest way to prevent cerebral-oral interface failure is by playing vocabulary builder games like Word Dynamo on dictionary.com. Warm up with a few high school level rounds, then challenge yourself with the 12+ levels. For best results our certified Brainologists* recommend playing at least once per week.

*We don't have any certified brainologists. We're pretty sure that doesn't exist. Apologies to any real brainologists reading, you are the real heroes.